That Time of the Month
On our Periods + 7 Ways to Have a Better Relationship with it
Happy Friday! In this week’s letter, you’ll learn about…
✍️We make a dive into the Menstruation Cycle
🔥 7 Ways for having a Better Relationship with our Menstruation Cycle
🖋️ Menstruation Cycle Journaling Prompts
📝 A free gift: Menstruation Cycle Exploration Journaling Page
🩸 It's That Time of the Month
🌸 A Story of Shame & Pain
I know very few women who have a good relationship with their menstruation cycle. From that time of the month to PSM, this is a story many have; a hate relationship filled with shame, pain, discomfort, irritability, moodiness, and of course The Pain that accompanies it.
And this is so heartbreaking! Because this part of our story is not only crucial for our creativity - in all forms - but also an essential part of our body and her system.
My story was also filled with pain and shame. From that first cycle of menstrual flow at age 13 while laying in bed for two days straight not being able to function - and feeling terrified as this was going to continue for decades - to the shame of having it be “visible” to the outside world. Besides your mother and some few best girlfriends, no one could know you were bleeding.
This pain and shame stayed with me for many years. It was around my early to mid-thirties I started to shift this vision, my reality, and my experience with my inner blood.
Besides the pain and shame, our inner blood often came with inconvenience, it made us feel filthy and it cost money as well! Just think about how much money you have spent your entire life on pads, tampons, new & extra underwear, and other relief products to make life during those days somewhat doable.
So, what was the shift?
This came from a feeling of being healthy —> having my menstruation flow each month meant that my body was doing what it was supposed to do, and therefore I had a healthy body.
I was relieved that over the years my irregular cycle became more and more regular, with what would be considered a manageable flow and pain - thanks to liquid Advil Capsule.
During Chemo I prepared myself to enter induced menopause and expected to stay in it due to my age. To my surprise, a month and a half after chemo, my womb came back to life.
Not only astonished but also feel sad I get when hearing those hateful words coming from women’s mouths about their inner blood flow - what I like to call Moontime - because I knew & understood that …
Rejecting our menstruation cycles is rejecting ourselves
This is no surprise as it has been very well ingrained into our culture, our minds & hearts, and into our bodies since the middle ages.
What about changing this today?
🌸 Phases, Stages, Seasons & Cycles
*From now on, I’m calling the menstruation cycle the Inner Moon Cycle.
In a previous letter about Cyclical Living, I mentioned the Inner Moon Cycle. Here, I touched on this cycle briefly as it is part of Nature’s Cycle.
Like the Moon, most women have an Inner Moon Cycle that takes around 28 to 30 days to complete and therefore it is often associated with the Moon Cycle and her phases (hence the name Inner Moon Cycle).
Even more, we see the seasons also reflected in our inner moon cycle. For that, we need to see our inner moon cycle like that: a cycle that starts on the day our blood starts to shed and continues a valuable process ending the day before we start bleeding again.
Knowing where we are in our cycle is an opportunity to use our energy wisely and it keeps us healthy. Taking each phase into consideration, and thus taking ourselves into consideration, allows us to be flexible instead of demanding.
If we continuously expect and demand to be “on” all the time we’ll get overwhelmed and feel stressed and risking ourselves to burn-out or even worse.
So, let’s take a quick peek into the phases, shall we?
Moontime Phase (Aka Menstruation)
This phase starts on the first day of our bleeding and is linked with the New Moon Phase and Winter.
Often our own energy is low during this time and it’s best to take it slow, go inward, and rest as much as possible.
Many women here in the Netherlands call these days “Being on my Moon” or “Landing on my moon”.
Archetype: The Crone
Pre-Ovulation Phase
Around a week after the new cycle, we arrive at a new phase. If we pay attention we notice our energy increasing, as well as our ideas and we start to get out of our “cave” to spend time outside and with other people.
This phase is linked to the Waxing Moon Phase, the First Quarter Moon Phase, and Spring Season.
Archetype: The Maiden
Ovulation Phase
Linked with the Full Moon Phase and Summer Season, we are at our highest peak energetically, and everything pushes us outward.
This is the time to shine, to be with others, to dance, and to celebrate.
Archetype: The Mother
Pre-Moontime Phase
Often we see PSM symptoms showing up. We notice our energy is slowly but surely decreasing.
This time is linked to the Waning Moon Phase, especially the Last Quarter Moon Phase, and Autumn Season.
Archetype: The Wise Woman
If we look at information about the relation to the Moon and our own Inner Moon Cycle, we’ll find that it’s said women often started their cycles together on the New Moon, when the Moon would not be visible at night. Our bodies were in synch with the Moon phases, and this darkness signaled our bodies when to bleed.
🌸 It’s Not Static
However, since welcoming artificial light, we women have gotten out of sync with the Moon.
This means we no longer start our cycles together or with the New Moon Phase. Instead, most of us have a personal cycle that often moves through the Moon phases progressively or for a period of time.
I used to start my Inner Moon Cycle around the Full Moon for many years, but this has changed a lot since getting my flow back, and now I fluctuate around the last days of the Waning Moon, the New Moon, and the first days of the Waxing Moon Phase.
I know many women who bleed in different moon phases during each new cycle - especially for those with an irregular cycle - and for others, it will fluctuate or progress slowly after a decade or so. And some will have always their moon on a specific Moon phase.
🌸 Why Bother?
You can try to sync your cycle with the Moon, so you’ll start your cycle on the New Moon. However, this is not necessary, and having your cycle start on another phase does not mean you’re not healthy or not doing what you're supposed to do!
As long as you know you’re healthy, it’s okay to be off-sync with the Moon. Just observe your own Inner Cycle together with the Moon cycle, and see how you’re doing and feeling. Maybe your peak is not on the Full Moon, but instead on the Last Quarter Moon Phase. Use this information to your advantage!
🌸 7 Ways to Have a Better Relationship with Your Moontime
Take it Slow: When your Moontime is here, try to have that day for yourself. Retrieve, have a self-care day, rest, and sleep.
Be Gentle With Yourself: Your energy is often low around the days of your Moontime. Don’t demand anything from yourself nor let anyone demand anything from you during this time.
Spend Time Alone: If possible, try to avoid obligations or people around this time. Retrieve into your home, sacred space, and or bed. Especially the day of your Moontime.
Go Offline: Again, during your Moontime, try to disconnect from the outside world.
Create a Self-Care Day: Have you been postponing your facial? Want to go to the Spa with you have been too busy lately? The days around your Moontime are the best times to practice Self-Care with capital letters. Allow yourself to have this time just for yourself.
Write in your Journal: Our Moontime is a great time for reflection and introspection so grab your journal and explore your inner landscapes.
Synching your Intentions & Energy with your Inner Moon Cycle: Using the Moon phases and comparing where you are in your own cycle, you’ll be able to see where your energy is at, when it’s high and mostly outward, and when it’s low and mainly inward. Plan your intentions, goals, and activities accordingly!
🖋️ Inner Moon Cycle Journaling Prompts
How has your relationship with your Inner Moon Cycle been (so far)?
How was - and still is - your environment in regards to women’s Inner Moon Cycle?
Feel free to share your answer and reflections in the comments:
📝 Inner Moon Cycle Exploration Journaling Page
If you love today’s letter and are excited about journaling the prompts above, then please feel free to grab the Inner Moon Cycle page I created! … This is my gift for you 🎁 .
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*Already subscribed but reading from the app or website? Then check this letter in your email inbox to access the free journal page.
💫 WeatherVane’s Flow
What I love & still amazes me is how much influence nature’s cycle has on each one of us. We just need to stop and pay attention to see this unfolding in front of our eyes - and for that matter, in our inner landscapes.
We can intentionally flow with the cycles, but the funny thing is that even when we’re not intentional about it, we still can see how we are moving into each rhythm and each flow.
So far, I thought to be quite intentional about my Autumn flow, but I guess I wasn’t really feeling it because Autumn sure makes sure I would feel it and several ways!
Not to go into much detail about it, let me just tell you I’ve felt the unexpected push to prepare more and better, to let things go, and to distance myself from some people. This push hasn’t been gentle or sweet, but more like an impatient parent pushing me to make things go/happen/release/prepare.
And it has been kind of difficult because this push has made me go over my energy levels - not so much autumn slowing down over here! - and I’ve been feeling quite exhausted. I’m in a better headspace than last week but I still feel a bit frustrated.
I understand is necessary, however, I still need to find the balance - also an autumn theme - and slow down even more.
📩 Upcoming Letter
✍️ Discovering our Rhythms & Patterns
🔥 What we can do with these Rhythms & Patterns
🖋️ Journaling prompts for this week’s letter
📝 A free gift: Moon Mandala Tracking Page
🌬️ Sending you magic & healing your way,
-Vane